We all know the old saying, you cannot give what you do not have. While many people seek love in other people, things or lifestyle, the basic truth about love is to love yourself first. The extent to which you love yourself is as almost the same extent to which you can love another, the energy that radiates from you forces its way into the next person.
Some people still ask this question, how do I love myself? Loving yourself first means accepting yourself for who you are, taking out time to discover you, to find out your strenghts, flaws and the things that make you tick. The earlier you begin to accept who you are and identify your worth, the easier it is to embrace and love yourself. You can start with loving tiny bits of you, for instance, I love my legs, I love the way I go out of my way to help people, I love the way I handle situations and lots more. All these put together eventually makes me realize the little things that make me whole and I appreciate that I can do these things thereby loving myself even more. So what’s important is to begin to identify the small things you like about you, acknowledge that you are human and the goal is to get better each day, feel good about the things you love doing and gradually you would move into accepting and loving the bigger YOU.
On the contrary, what you need to stop doing is to stop focusing on your weaknesses or complaning about the things that make you detest yourself, or your inability to do certain things without acknowledging that you are good at other things. You have to stop comparing yourself with other people and key into what makes you stand out. Accept that you cannot be everything and give other people room to be those things. Its vital to know your worth and remind yourself each day the beautiful things that make YOU.
Also, you really are what you attract. If you are a happy, secure and confident person, you would also attract same and vice-versa. Once you start loving yourself appropriately and focusing on the things that make you happy, you would begin to discover that the right and deserving kind of love would come to you from friends, family and those you come in contact with. We often times attract people who share the same values, beliefs and views as ourselves. We shouldnt always say we want someone God-fearing, polite and hardworking when we ourselves are nothing close to it. Its just like saying you want someone who is truthful and hardworking and your ways are lazy and dubious, how on earth is that gonna work? You can’t expect someone to also love you with your baggages, low self esteem and complaints, you have to learn to love yourself the way you want people to love you.
Often times, some people are in relationships because they can’t stand being single, they feel that they constantly need to be with someone to make them feel secure or to tell them their worth or compliment them. They lean on their partners so badly even when it is clear to them that they are no longer wanted, but rather than move on, they would plead to remain in the relationship. The truth is, non of those things would really make you any more happier than you are because you already feel so insecure. The remedy to this, is to learn to discover and accept yourself. You dont need to be in a relationship to prove your worth to anyone. Happiness should start with you and not in the thought of being with someone or in a relationship. Its better being single and happy than being in an undeserving kind of relationship. The moment you begin to love yourself, things begin to fall into place, you accept the things that come and let go of the things that go.
Its so much important to focus on yourself, be alive within you, feel your existence and appreciate you. Say I LOVE ME, its okay to fall in love with yourself, love yourself the way you want to be loved and as Debasish Mridha puts it “if you ever want to love someone else, love yourself unconditionally first”.
Thanks guys for reading.
Please share with me what you love about yourself, I wish to know all about it.